I thought if there was any time to speak about this issue it would be during the Holidays. Today I visited some one very special to me and he has been apart of my life for 20 years and when he became sick, I was so mortified how many people would not come see him. I visit every week, he was my Dad’s Doctor and my Doctor and I adore him. He has a heart of gold and held my hand when my dad was so sick. I can see in his eyes his disappointment on visitors. He looked at me and said “Those you expect to come, don’t” and those you don’t think you will see again, you do”.
I know for some people, they hate hospitals, well let me tell you I really hate Hospitals, I also hate going to Stanford. Not because they are not nice, it seems like they keep finding new things. So If that’s your reason “It’s not good enough”, If you don’t know what to say, how about “Hello” talk about work, family normal stuff, not sick stuff.
No one knows when there number is up and I have been at Stanford 21/2-3 weeks, had heart surgery and was scared, alone, felt unloved, I will never forget that feeling as long as I am on this earth, I will visit everyone sick, let them know they made a difference in my life and others. Its a part of closer. Every time I see him, he hugs me before and after and I know I have nothing left to say, I will still go see him and talk about life. Let them share what they want, I don’t intrude. But when I say goodbye and hug him, I cry every time, because I may never see him again. Its uncomfortable, difficult but There is not excuse to not visit someone. I have been bringing him my photo books to show him that he can meditate with my photos and pretend your there. You can’t buy that in a box of candy or flowers.
There is no excuse to not visit. You will regret never saying goodbye, a hug, a handshake a smile. He’s fighting for his life, friends, family love can make you fight a little harder.
A memory Jar is a awesome way for family to let them know how you feel, decorate a box, or a jar and everyone writes there favorite memory with that person, That’s what makes them happy, knowing they made a difference in your life.